We always talk about New Years being a chance for new beginnings, a chance to start over, to do things differently than we have in the past. However, sometimes, the first thing that we have to do is do NOTHING! What do I mean by that? We often are so wound up in our own thought and especially our emotions that we often REACT; we take action purely based on these emotions. What is the usual outcome? TROUBLE! Why is that? Well, we all no, our emotions are not always rational and appropriate for a given circumstance. Those of is on this journey of recovery of one kind or another, often over exaggerated and dramatize our situations. As the old saying goes, we “make mountains out of mole hills.” Then because of we see our lives as so awfully, we want to share our pity party with EVERYONE around us; and we expect them to completely join our party and validate how terrible out lives are. But, then when they don’t do so, we get angry and see their responses to us as even more proof to confirm that our feelings are justified. What lessons do we learn in this process? “We’re worthless, our lives are hopeless, and we can’t trust anyone to support or help us.” But is that actually true or is it just our perceptions of our circumstances?
I challenge you to consider this a moment, then see if you do not agree that it is actually the later.
As this we enter this year, I urge you to take time to slow down and in the midst of the storm, be still, be silent and do nothing at first. What happens when we stop and do not react automatically? We give our brain a chance to begin to rationally process the situation and we can come to more appropriate and logical interpretations of what is going on. As a result, we make wiser and healthier decisions for our lives and our recovery.
Thus the first sentence if the following quote applied…
The beginning of wisdom is silence. The second step is listening. — Unknown
That brings us to the second sentence. As mentioned earlier, when we are falling apart in the midst of our pity party, we are to busy telling others how bad things are, we don’t hear much less listen to what out friends and support system have to say that just might be positive, encouraging and helpful to us. Thus, we need to learn and force ourselves to share what is going on with us, but then be willing to be quiet and not only hear, but LISTEN to what those around have to share. Will their advice always be right on? Of course it won’t, but we will never know if it is good or bad if we will not listen to it. Even if it is good advice and information, we are still under no obligation to follow it. You listen and then think it through for yourself. The most important part is being willing to LISTEN.
That brings me to one other brief point that I want to share. As you enter in to this New Year I encourage you to take some time to be still and be silent. Listen to what this past year has taught you? What mistakes have you made and what lesson did you learn from having done so? What success have you achieved, and what have you learned about yourself in the process. Remember the falls, but only briefly, remember more the getting back up. CELEBRATE your victories and accomplishments. Having done so; look at the year that is to come. Set goals that you are brave and bold, but achievable. Set smaller goals that will be used as markers of your progress. Imagine life as a marathon, the ultimate goal is the finish line; the smaller goals are the mile markers along the route.
So my friends, I again encourage you…
First, Be Still, Be Silent!
Remember Yesterday, Hope for Tomorrow, Live Today!